No, this article is not dedicated to the manufacturers of the I-Pod. In fact, it’s quite a pity that the fruit that was once better known for its forbidden felicities and eternal efficacies is today associated with a ‘touchy,’ palm size, silicon made gadget. Anyway, since the intention behind this article is neither to put Apple inc. out of business, nor to put the stock markets in jeopardy, I’ll just restrict myself to the Apple fruit alone.
Though our incessant existence, starting from the ancestral monkey, has acquainted us with innumerable varieties of fruits, the Apple fruit has always been peculiarly distinctive in its own ways. For starters, it’s ‘A for Apple’ and not ‘A for Apricot.’ I suppose that explains a lot. Not convinced yet? Well, if you had paid enough attention in your 8th standard science class, without ogling at the girl sitting in front, you would be aware that it was the Apple that hit Sir Isaac Newton hard on his head making him realize that the dude who jumped off the 15th floor of his building didn’t die merely because of his inability to fly.
It took ages for man to figure out – what goes up comes down and what goes down stays down. Remember, the Apple made it happen! Oh yes, Newton too, but it took him some beating!
The thing about the Apple fruit that astonishes me the most is the fact that some people still strongly believe that an Apple a day can actually keep the doctor away! Wow, how about that for optimism? Well, I cannot help but imagine how it would be if an apple a day can actually keep the doctor away. Apple Inc. would be a farming company, living up to its name; Apollo Hospitals would probably be renamed Apple-owe Hospitals. Doctors would be businessmen, businessmen would be engineers and engineers would be on the streets. Oh wait, aren’t engineers on the streets already? I’m sorry, my bad. Four years of engineering has put me in quite a disoriented state. Well, maybe I should start having more apples now.
Another attribute of the Apple that has never ceased to astound me is the concept of ‘Adam’s Apple.’ Firstly, if it is Adam’s apple, what on earth is it doing in my throat? Secondly, what kind of person would go around searching for an Apple when he is left all alone in an isolated island with a beautiful girl? Mr. Adam sure must have been one real hungry man. Unfortunate him; He didn’t even get to swallow his Apple completely. I do understand the lamentable state this would have put him in and my heart does go out for him. Mr. Adam might have had a tragic end, but his legacy sure lives on, much to the chagrin of my poor throat.
Inspired by Sir Newton, if you are planning to sit under an Apple tree on a scientific expedition, I strongly recommend you not to. One, it is the 21st century; the tree would be cut off by someone before even you could look up and say ‘Baa baa black sheep.’ Two, Sir Highness Newton has left us with enough derivations to break our heads with anyway. So, we do not need your contributions; relax, take it easy, use the Apple for the purpose it is meant to be used. Eat and enjoy eating.
Until the next time an apple falls off a tree, and makes history, take care and stay away from the tree.
Appy days!
